Lesson – Turning around when feeling overwhelmed
Our past does not equal our future. No body wants to fail again.
Nobody wants to give his or her all, only to be disappointed. But what matters is not yesterday but what is done right now.
Colonel Sanders only fulfilled his dream when he was 65. He was broke and alone. He got his first social security cheque for $105 and he got mad but instead of blaming society or just writing congress a nasty note: he started asking himself “What could I do that would be valuable for other people? What could I give back?” He started knowing on doors, telling each restaurant owner “I have a great chicken recipe, and I think if you use it, it’ll increase your sales. And I’d like a percentage of those increase” Many laughed at his face. They said “Look, old man, get out of here.”
Did he give up? No. Instead he focused on how to tell his story more effectively to the next restaurant. He was refused 1,009 times before he heard his first yes.
So why don’t more people follow Nike ad “Just Do It”? because they’re shutdown by the fear of failure…
Lesson 2 – There are no failures
It’s how we deal with our setbacks that shape our lives more than anything else.
God delays are not god denials.
Keep at it. If you keep striving to make things better and we learn form our mistakes, then we will succeed.
Lesson 3 – Make decisions
A real decision is made when you cut off any other possibilities except that you’ve committed to do to make it a reality, when you will not look back, when you will not even consider the alternative of giving up.
Mr. Honda (the founder of Honda motors) often decided to see some of the biggest obstacles in his way as mere hurdles in the race to reach his goals. He decided there’s always a way to succeed if you’re really committed.
Was Mr. Honda Lucky? May be if LUCK means Labor Under Correct Knowledge.
Lesson 4 – Build up your beliefs
Belief is a feeling of certainty.
If you say you believe you’re intelligent, all you’re really saying is “I feel certain I’m intelligent”. That sense of certainty allows you to tap resources to act intelligently to produce the results you want.
You can choose what to believe about yourself, these beliefs will determine the actions you take.
Lesson 5 – What you see is what you get.
Let’s say you go to a party, and you’ve a video camera. All night, you focus on the left corner of the room where a couple is arguing. As you focus on it, you too get caught up in their frustrations. You start to think “What a miserable couple. What a miserable party…”
What if, that same night at the party, you focus on the right corner? A bunch of people are having a blast. If someone asks you “What was the party like?” You’d say “Oh! It was a wonderful party!”.
It’s very easy for anyone to slip into lousy feelings. Whatever you think about most you’ll experience.
Lesson 6 – Questions are the answers.
Next time, you feel frustrated, stand up, take a deep breath, put a silly grin on your face for no good reason and ask yourself “What’s great about this?” What’s funny about this?
“Will the problem even matter 10 years from now?”
Problem-solving questions
- What’s great about this problem?
- What’s not perfect yet?
- What am I willing to do to make it the way I want it?
- What am I willing to stop doing to make it the way I want it?
- How can I enjoy the process while making the way I want it?
Morning power questions
- What am I happy about in my life right now? What about that makes me happy? How does that make me feel?
- What am I excited…
- What am I proud of…
- What am I grateful…
- What am I enjoying most…?
- What am I committed to…
- Who do I love? Who loves me? What makes me loving? How does that make me feel?
Evening power questions
- What have I given today? In what ways have I been a giver today?
- What did I learn today?
- How has today added to the quality of my life?
- How can I use today as an investment into my future?
Lesson 7 – Get moving.
Most of us already realize our emotions affect our physical state. But few of us realize how powerfully the reverse is true;
When we’re moved physically we’re moved emotionally too.
Emotion is created by motion. Our body’s chemistry, our physical activities (running, clapping, jumping) to smallest movements in the muscles of our face affect the way we think, feel and behave.
Find those who’re confident and successful. Model their physiology. Their gestures, breathing, walk, language. Sow the same seeds and you’ll reap the benefits.
Lesson 8 – Speak winning language.
Say “ecstatic” instead of just “okay”. Be “enthralled” instead of just “interested”. Feel “superb” instead of “all right”. Instead of feeling “fine”, feel “phenomenal”. You’re not just “determined”, you’re “unstoppable”.
| Negative Expression | Transforms Into |
| Stupid | Discovering |
| Angry | Disenchanted |
| Disappointed | Delayed |
| Depressed | Calm before action |
| Embarrassed | Aware |
| That stinks | That’s a little aromatic |
| Failed | Learned something |
| Lost | Searching |
| Terrible | Different |
| Boring Expression | Transforms Into |
| Awake | Energized |
| Cool | Outrageous |
| Pretty good | Unstoppable |
| Fortunate | Unbelievably blessed |
| Good | Can’t get any better |
| Okay | Super |
| Quick | Explosive |
| Smart | Brilliant |
| Tasty | Scrumptious |
Lesson 9 – Break through with a new metaphor.
Life is a beach or life is a battle. If you think the former, you might believe people could have fun together like a giant family. If you describe the latter, you might believe people are always fighting each other.
When you choose a metaphor to describe your life, you choose the beliefs it supports too.
Be careful about the way you describe your world to yourself or anyone else.
Lesson 10 – Setting Goals
Greatest achievers always have the same first step – setting of a goal. One must realize
Achieving the goal isn’t half as important as setting it, then taking massive action towards its attainment.
We set goals to give our lives focus and to move in the direction we like to. The harder you prepare, the luckier you seem to get.
Successful people educate themselves to continuous improvement. They constant want to do better. These people break a goal into bite-size pieces, achievable sub-goal. They also celebrate the achievement of each small step. This helps you build momentum and develop habits that gradually turns your dreams into reality.
What would you do if you knew you could not fail? Be specific, the more detailed you are, the more empowered you’re to create a result.
Lesson 11 – 10-Day Mental Challenge
- Next 10 days, refuse to hang onto any crummy thoughts, feelings, language…
- When you catch yourself – and you will – immediately ask yourself questions to get to a better place. Start with the Problem-Solving questions.
- When you wake up, ask yourself the morning power questions. Before you go to bed, ask yourself with evening power questions.
- For following 10 days, focus completely on solutions, not on problems.
- If you have a lousy thought, don’t’ beat yourself up. Change it immediately. But if you dwell on more than 5 minutes, start the ten days over.
When you’re going through tough times…
Look for someone who’s having a tougher time. Help that person in making it just a little better. This will put your problem into perspective. Your burden will probably seem light in comparison and you’ll see firsthand the amazing courage people invariably show in meeting life’s greatest challenges.
Even if you don’t solve their problem, even if all you do is comfort and care, you’ll learn you cannot give a gift without receiving one back tenfold. Tony isn’t talking about getting rewarded for your efforts. He’s talking about tapping into one of the deepest human needs.
Simply by giving unselfishly, you’ll experience the ultimate in human joy and fulfillment.